Low Maintenance Artists 6534

The South American tour has gone swimmingly, and we’re setting attendance records every time we play, despite having an abbreviated lineup, which I thought might affect the enthusiasm.

Rory, Kim, Glen, and Enrico didn’t join us for this tour for professional and personal reasons. Rory is set to star in the adaptation of my novella, “Flags” while Kim stayed home to repair the damage his past transgressions have created. Glen is in New York doing session work with the jazz giants, and Enrico is focusing on his solo career.

That’s a lot of talent to lose.

Fortunately, Brandon Basil and Benji Sonser have stepped in on bass and drums, and have played amazing every night. I didn’t bring another guitarist, or backup singer, so it’s Kirby, Myron Tom, Benji, and Brandon getting it done.

Just another word on Brandon and Benji.

Rory and Glen are amazing musicians, but so are Brandon and Benji. I picked them because I knew how great they are, and how they create the magic for the Clyde Zugg Band without much recognition. When I asked them to tour with me, they were floored, but I reminded them of their sublime skills, which have wowed the audiences down here. Kirby remarked at how proficient both men are, and how unfazed they are under the spotlight, which is another reason I chose them. I couldn’t help but smile when Rory and Glen called to say how awesome we sound with Brandon and Benji, and I didn’t have to strain to hear the envy.

Another quality of Brandon and Benji is their low maintenance, which has made the transition seamless. I haven’t heard either one of them complain about anything, and they couldn’t care less about fame. I told them that we could serve them dog food, and they wouldn’t gripe.

In short, Brandon and Benji are low maintenance artists who define the word ‘sublime’ which is about as high a praise you can give a fellow musician.

Notes And Feeling 6533

Gowans was packed from front to back, and side to side, which made it a tight fit, but we managed. Dale brought in a classy upright that we positioned securely on the makeshift stage, but also allowed for Glen’s drums, and Rory’s upright bass. I peered out from the back entrance, and saw several members of the press looking frantically around for us; undoubtedly pissed that I didn’t make their jobs easier by playing the gig in New York, but I couldn’t care less about making things convenient for the vultures.

Wilmington isn’t a hotbed for jazz, which is why I thought it would be a perfect place to play. Playing New York, Chicago, New Orleans; or L.A., would have created a bigger stir, but playing in a college town by the beach with Yankees and affluence all around makes for a more interesting crowd; one that may or may not like jazz, but that’s the point; to play a crowd not filled with aficionados.

And Wilmington is convenient for us.

Rory, Glen, and I played every song off the album, plus several cover tunes that weren’t standards. We rehearsed for this moment, nothing could have prepared us for the experience, which can only be described as supernatural. The music flowed seamlessly out of us, which in turn captivated the crowd; many of whom had no idea what to expect.

When you’re locked into the music, amazing things happen.

After the show, the press interviewed us while still trying to wrap their heads around the performance. “We felt this music because we love this music, I said while sipping bottled water. “I learned early on that playing without feeling makes music cold and sterile, regardless of how expertly it is played. You can hear the difference between someone playing with feeling, and someone going through the motions. That’s why I always mix up my shows to keep the band sharp. If you’re just playing for the money, you’ll eventually be found out.”

Music takes technical skill and feeling to master, and it’s the latter that many musicians struggle with. I’ve read many reviews about bands who don’t miss a note, but play uninspired because they’ve played their set so many times, which reduces the music to notes, and little else. It’s always about keeping the notes fresh and alive, and that takes work.

But if you’re a musician, that’s your job.

A Nice Day For A Wedding In Raleigh 6532

Blake and I made the trek to Raleigh, to attend Kira’s wedding, which was a conservative affair that seemed to irritate those who were expecting alcohol at the reception, which was held at the church. Naturally, Blake and I were unaffected by the absence of alcohol, and I actually thought it was a grand idea, as everyone was on their best behavior.

If there was any tension between Kira, and her father, they didn’t let it show, which was a major relief. I know they didn’t patch things up that quickly, but I do believe Kira has developed a better sense of perspective about her father’s youthful indiscretions. Kim was wrong for what he did, but it’s not as if he denied, or tried to deflect blame for his behavior, and the fact that his wife forgave him should set the tone for how the rest of the family deals with the past.

Kira was delighted, as was I, that Robin and Maire made it up to the wedding. They decided to go early this morning, and made arrangements for the kids. Laura wanted to go, but COVID nixed her plans. Kira completely understood everyone’s situation, and was grateful for those who did attend.

Carol and Curtis showed up in time for the reception, and apologized for getting lost in Raleigh traffic. They joined us at the table, and looked a tad harried. Brooke then appeared, and said that she was overwhelmed by the congestion up this way. Robin smiled at Curtis, and asked if he missed the road. “No, but I hear Ruckus is living up to his name in concert,” he replied. “I’m flying out Monday to see them in St. Louis, on Tuesday, which will mark the end of the tour for the year,” Robin then said.

Hey, that’s a good idea.

Blake gave me a wary look, but didn’t say anything, and neither did I. Today was about Kira and Daniel, who looked like a man who had no idea what he was getting himself into. I thought to myself that he’ll be a good husband and father, and provide a nice environment for his family.

Congrats to the couple, whose future looks bright.

Elusive Wisdom 6531

My niece, Kira, is getting married in early November, to a doctor, and I couldn’t be any happier for her. Kim is also filled with joy, but as I spoke with him on the phone, I could tell something was wrong. “You sound nervous,” I said. “Scragg, my past has come back to haunt me at the worst time. I guess I should’ve known it eventually would, but it’s not like I’ve just become famous. Now, a couple of women with pics of me in varying stages of undress are about to surface, and other women are making accusations.” “Are they true,” I asked. “Yes, I was a cheating bastard, but I changed, and promised Michelle that I would be faithful, and I have been, but I was married at the time of these affairs.”

Oh, shit.

Like many young men who think they’re bigger and badder than they are, Kim succumbed to the temptations of the road, which I figured would have come out long before now, but I digress, any infidelity is bad regardless of the circumstances, and now Kira is disappointed by her father’s cheating ways back in the day, which is understandable, but it was a long time ago, and Michelle did forgive him. “Shit, Scragg, Kim Jr. is getting married early next year, and he, too, is disgusted with me. I just want Kira to have a beautiful wedding, and then a wonderful life, but this shit is causing a whole bunch of stress.” “Just stress the fact that you’ve changed, and that it was eons ago,” I replied, not knowing what else to say.

I told Blake about Kim’s past dalliances while married, and she didn’t seem too surprised. “I guess the temptation was too much,” she said. “I understand his children’s disgust, but I hope they don’t ruin their weddings over it,” she added. “It comes at you fast, and although the Wham Bam Band wasn’t a national act, they were very popular down this way, which meant they were regional celebrities, and that means the illicit trappings of success were constantly swirling around them. Kim was a young man when all this happened, and I would have thought this would have broken earlier, but it doesn’t matter now; it’s out, and it is something Kira and Kim Jr. will have to come to terms with. I’m not trying to sound cold; however, no one is getting any younger, and they both need to move on, especially if their mother did.”

I never cheated on Blake, but then again, I was much older than Kim when all the forbidden fruit and frills became easily accessible, which I am thankful for every day. Youth, and its reckless pleasures have struck down many men regardless of their stature in life, but when it is all around you, it’s extremely difficult to resist, which is why Farley never leaves his hotel room while on tour. I’m not making any excuses for men, or women, who lapse; I’m just stating a fact.

The most precious quality in youth is wisdom.

A Little Is Enough 6530

I was channel surfing when I spotted an interview Blake did in New York with Robin Roberts, which fully displayed her wit, charm, and country roots that captivated the jaded cosmopolitan crowd.

People seem to think that Blake made this transformation from corn pone scholar to world-class writer, and refined lady when she made it big, but that doesn’t tell the whole story. Most people don’t get a chance to show their intellect and wit to the masses, so only those who know them know who they are. What makes Blake special is the lack of pretense, which keeps her grounded. Like me, she understands that we work in a crazy and fickle business, so it’s best to prepare for the future, and keep your priorities straight. Blake can play the game, but she’s going to do it on her own terms, and her way is being herself, and allowing some of her social awkwardness to show; nothing can prepare you for fame, so just be yourself, and try not to make a fool of yourself.

And it certainly helps that Blake is a beautiful lady.

“Why are you watching that,” Blake said as she walked into the room. “Just admiring your style.” “Elmer, I am so glad that is over.” “I thought you have more interviews coming up?” “Online, and I’m ready for that.” “Admit, it was kind of fun, wasn’t it,” I then asked her. Blake let out a giggle, and admitted she got temporarily intoxicated by the fame, but quickly came to her senses. “When I was alone in that hotel room, it hit me, and I decided that I’m not cut out for the road, or too much fame for that matter.” “So a little is enough?” “More than enough.” “Good answer.” “Are you burning out of this, Elmer,” Blake then asked. “Oh yeah, it’s time to turn it down,” I replied. Blake smiled before giving me a hug.

The fame, money, and all the trappings are nice, but they’re superficial, which means they’re also fleeting if you get too wrapped up in it. Always keep your feet on the ground, and your head clear because in this business, bloodsuckers are everywhere. Count your blessings because there is always someone better than you who didn’t catch a break, so keep in mind that you’re not all that.

Humility is also easier to take than insufferable arrogance.

American Creme 6529

We wrapped up the shooting for “The Depths” and Jordan told us he would let us know when the film was ready. Both Kevin and I agreed that it was the most unusual filming experience we’d ever done, but we didn’t complain because it was a breeze, except for the scenes inside the submersible. I still chuckle when, in one scene, the sub begins to shake violently as it hovers over the wreck site. That effect was created by three guys with poles jostling the sub. I’m glad the filming is over because Blake is back home, and has sworn off the road.

We checked on Caroline, who was looking radiant. Despite the chaos in the house, I’ve never seen my oldest daughter happier, and with the addition of Nina, and her daughter Alina; more of my kinfolk from Russia, who were brought here to help out with the kids, the house does have some order. “This is still hard to believe, but I don’t have time to dwell on it too much because these guys are a handful, and then some,” Caroline said while tending to two of the babies. Blake and the girls then started to talk about things not in my purview, so I walked outside, and took Sebastian for a walk.

I am who I am, and Blake accepts that, which I am grateful for because without her understanding, none of this is possible. I also realize that she doesn’t need me anymore to provide her with a comfortable lifestyle, so I’m humbled to the point where I’m satisfied taking a supporting role around the house in some areas. Everyone on the farm knows that Blake runs the show around here, and I only call the shots when it comes to the horses.

I then got a call from Darrell Millikan, a horse breeder in South Carolina, who sometimes gets in over his head.

“Scragg, I got a surprise for you,” he said in thick drawl. “I’m good, Darrell.” “Let me in, I have something to show you.” “Darrell”

Oh, shit.

Darrell pulled up with a horse trailer in tow, and I was prepared to tell him to go elsewhere. “Look, just let me show you before you say no,” he said before I could get a word in. We walked to the back of the trailer, and Darrell opened it up. I looked on in awe as he guided an American Cream Draft to the grass. “He’s gorgeous,” I said. “Yes, he is, and he’s yours if you want him.” “What do you have in him?” “Just spot me a couple of grand, Scragg, I’m getting out of this racket.” “Will do.”

I called David, who smiled when he saw the horse. “Is that what I think it is,” he asked. “An American Cream it is, and I’m not going to ask any more questions because Darrell is doing the right thing by getting out of the horse game, but tell me, what else do you have?” “A Suffolk Punch,” Darrell said with a grin. “Another draft horse, but that’s okay, get in touch with me this week.” “Will do, Scragg.”

I named the horse Nile, and then called Becky, who giggled uncontrollably when she saw the horse. After David does his examination, take Nile to the field, and do your thing.” “He’s beautiful, and he looks ready to stretch his legs,” Becky replied. “He’s two, so he’s still a youngster,” Darrell said. “You’ll grow to be a big, strapping guy,” Becky added, as she stroked his mane.

Horses are my thing, especially now that I can afford them. I have an affinity with them, and I enjoy working with them. They call me a world-class horseman, but I prefer you leave out the world-class part. I just love being around the animals, and they seem to feel the same about me.

Welcome to the farm, Nile.

The Depths Of Cheapness 6528

Blake hit the road for a short stint, but was in a much better frame of mind this time. She’ll be doing a few talk shows in New York, and then some book signings, before coming back home.

The girls started school, and Bambi and my grown daughters are pulling together while I work a little film called, “The Depths” a spooky story about a sunken WWII German military transport ship that is supposedly cursed because two submersibles perished trying to reach the ship. Jordan convinced me to do the film, and promised it wouldn’t take long. Kevin also got corralled, which will mark the first time we starred in a movie since “Small Time” The flick is being shot as cheaply as possible, which means there are few frills; however, Jordan has a crack team of techs who can make anything look real.

And a sunken ship at the bottom of the ocean is no exception.

Kevin and I went to the studio to find a large aquarium filled with seawater with a replica of a sunken ship at the bottom. As we gave it a closer look, we were stunned to see that it looked like the ocean floor, complete with a debris field. “The MV Hans Voss,” a young tech said with pride. “And how was it sunk,” I asked? “By a Soviet sub, sir.” “This looks real,” Kevin remarked in awe. “Yep, now get in the submersible,” Jordan said as we walked into the studio. “Where is it,” I asked. “There,” Jordan said, pointing to a contraption with four seats that appeared to be oval-shaped. The tech then put the fiberglass shell over it, and it became a realistic submersible. “The Holy Diver,” Jordan declared. “You rip that off, Dio,” I asked. “Yep, but I digress, get in it,” Jordan replied. Kevin and I took a seat in the prop, and Jordan declared that we were ready. “For what,” I asked? “Shooting.” “Now?” “Yep, let’s go.”

What the…

I play Jim Sturge, the owner and builder on the Holy Diver, while Kev play J.J. Alters, a marine biologist. Two other actors will play a billionaire, and a reporter. “Hold on to your dicks because here we go,” Jordan said. “Who wrote the script,” I asked. “I did,” Jordan replied. “Okay, it’s your game, but I’m keeping you to your word about this being quick.” “You ain’t seen quick, Scragg, so strap yourself in.”

Oh, shit.

Jordan knows how to make cheap movies look grand; or at least not cheap, so I’m confident this project will look good. Kev and I aren’t putting ourselves out that much, and we’ll get a nice chunk of money if all goes well. Anyway, here we go.

We’re mining the depths of cheapness.

A Stark Dichotomy Or Peas In A Pod? 6527

Blake was an emotional wreck after nearly a month away promoting her book, which is by far the biggest selling book this year, and is on paced to shatter records.

And at this moment, Blake couldn’t care less.

“I can’t stand it, Elmer, it’s impossible,” she screamed. “All they do is look for openings to make you look bad. I know I have my faults, so fuck it, let’s just promote the book. ”

Blake is seeing up close, what it is like to be a celebrity, and dealing with a blood-sucking media whose only goal is to bring you down some notches, and look for trash to sell. Screenwriters aren’t celebrated in Hollywood unless they direct, act, or produce their work, so while Blake got accolades from the writing community, she never faced the fire like Stephen King, John Grisham, or Colleen Hoover.

And then there is the fact that she is married to me.

Blake is highly educated, well-spoken, gorgeous, and still a country girl at heart, while I’m considered a vile creature who is a master manipulator. “How can such a beautiful and refined woman be married to such an awful man,” more than one media hack has asked. “It’s such a stark dichotomy; like Beauty and the Beast; The Lady and the Tramp.“

Then, the vultures brought up Blake’s past involvement with criminals, and the accusations she has endured over the years. “There’s no mystery why she’s with the Scragg Man; she’s just like the bastard, only prettier and more refined. Blake Schneider, like her husband, loves guns, money, and anything that will turn a profit,” one dickhead wrote. “Stark dichotomy my rear end; more like, peas in a pod,” he continued.

I told her to block it out of her mind, and enjoy her time home. Blake will finish the tour, and she’ll come out of it a stronger person.

And hey, who cares what a vulture thinks, anyway?

Katz’s, And Realizing How Fast Time Goes By 6526

Blake’s book will be released this coming Tuesday, to great anticipation, which was expertly cultivated by Blake, and her publicist, and now she’s off to L.A., then the rest of the West Coast, before heading east. Blake won’t spend too much time on the road; however, she knows that she has to plug this book in every way possible.

I decided that before the girls start school, they should have an excursion, so I arranged one with the blessing of Blake, to New York City; however, my wife insisted that a couple of the security guys go with us, so Charles and Jacque were called back into duty. Both men are seniors, and have girlfriends, but they insisted on handling this operation, and they handled everything with aplomb that only years of experience can do.

We arrived in New York, and immediately headed to Katz’s Delicatessen, the New York City landmark that I wanted the girls to see. Charles and Jacque arranged for a Suburban with an experienced driver, and we got Imran, a young Pakistani man, who’s been driving in New York City for five years. He picked us up, took all of our bags, and asked where we wanted to go. The hotel and then to Katz’s in Brooklyn. “They are very close, so that makes it easy,” Imran replied.

After checking in, we headed to the famous delicatessen, which always seems to be bustling. Imran parked the vehicle in a place that seemed odd, but I didn’t ask questions. We walked into the deli, and got in line.

I could feel eyes upon me.

I maintained my composure, and when someone asked me if I was who they thought I was, I smiled, and said I was Fred Jones, from Ames, Iowa. “You sure look like the Scragg Man,” a young lady said. “Really?” “Yes, sir.” “Well, I feel honored, then.”

Chants of Scragg Man, Scragg Man, then began.

I took a bow, and said I always wanted to come here. “What are you going to order, Scragg,” someone called out? “The six-person meal, the Reuben sandwich.” “Take a seat,” a young man told us. “Nah, I don’t want to jump the line.” “Follow me, please.” The young man guided us to a back table, and then said that he knows I wouldn’t want the girls to be front and center, but that I could sure walk around. Charles and Jacque shook their heads, and nodded to a couple of cops, who smiled back.

Hey, it’s what I do.

I strolled around the deli chatting and cutting up with the patrons, posed for selfies, and signed some autographs. I came here for the food, but got far more than that. When our order arrived at the table, I told the crowd that I appreciated their kindness and humor. The deli erupted in cheers, and I went to eat my sandwich.

The meal and atmosphere were incredible, and I made another round before leaving. We all got tee-shirts and hats from the deli, which was mighty nice, and the owner, A young man named Jack Dell, told me to stop by more often. I then did an interview with the press before retiring back to the hotel.

I asked Elizabeth and Amy if they were uncomfortable at the deli. They laughed, and replied that they know who I am, but that they knew I would make their safety top priority, which I did. “It was an unforgettable experience, Daddy, and I know tomorrow will be, too,” Elizabeth said.

My girls are growing up fast, which means I’m getting old, and I need to be home more often to see them blossom. I realize that being a star has given them every financial advantage, but they need more than my money.

But today, it was about seeing the Big Apple, eating at Katz’s, and having a blast.

A Memory Of Blood 6525

While the worldwide media condemned me for releasing “Live at the Green Light” the album of dirty drinking songs that has created quite the buzz; even if much of it is vitriol from those with no sense of humor; Blake informed me that her book, “A Memory of Blood” will be released in a few weeks. “We want to build it up first, but I guess you know all about that. This has been planned for a while, but at first, it was just a rumor, also by design,” she said.

I knew Blake was dabbling in a book, and there has been rumors that she was going to publish one, but they were just that, and I never gave them any thought, but apparently, all that has changed, and she has actually written a book. “I suppose you wouldn’t have a copy of it on you,” I asked. Blake smiled, and reached into the drawer, and pulled out a hefty tome. “Here it is,” she declared before handing me the book. I looked over the book, whose cover of a silhouette of a woman with a trickle of blood running through the center of her. “I have a meeting to go to, but it’s on the computer, so go find yourself a place to read,” Blake said.

I retreated to my building outside, and began reading my wife’s book. Immediately, I was pulled in by her impeccable prose. The story begins in 1966, when a teenager named Naomi Morrell is watching her brutish father have sex with a teenage girl.

My gut churned, and a feeling of dread consumed me

After the prelude, chapter 1 starts with Naomi asking her mother if she knew about her father’s infidelity. Naomi’s mother, Cheryl, laughs, and tells her that’s only half the story.

From there, I couldn’t pull myself away from the book.

I finished the book in the early evening, and was drained from the experience. I’ve never read anything so intense, and unrelenting, which kept the adrenaline pumping, but left me wiped out. The story centered around the murder of Jack Morrell, Naomi’s abusive father, and for a while, you thought Cheryl did the deed; however, near the end, when Naomi is now a woman in her early seventies, the bomb is dropped, and it is revealed she committed the murder. She also murdered her first husband, and got away with it, which I found very unsettling.

When it comes to putting words together to tell a story, Blake has no peers. Her ability to weave a tale that flows while providing plenty of jarring moments is simply sublime, and I can only marvel at her almost supernatural ability to write amazing work.

Blake then asked me what I thought.

“I’m jealous,” I replied. “What?” “I read your writing, and I can only imagine how you do it with such perfection.” “Thank you, Elmer, but I’m not all that.” “No, Blake, you’re every bit of that, and more. You’re peerless, Blake, and that’s just the size of it, and I couldn’t be prouder of you.

Blake gave me a big hug.

Blake is so good that she is scary.