Money And Low Character 5024

The security team and I had breakfast at the hotel restaurant where we saw Van Lear and Hatteberg looking disconsolate at the table across from us. The two men wanted to run, but I insisted that they join us for the first meal of the day. “Why do you want to do this to us,” Van Lear spat out like a child. “Because I want to make sure that you understand the error of your ways,” I replied. “We understand,” Hatteberg pleaded. “You sure?” “Yes.” “Okay, well sit with us anyway because we could use the company.” “Scragg, we’re convinced that you’re not some doped-up rock star oblivious to his surroundings. We know that you’re razor sharp and call the shots in your band. All we want to do is get out of here and get on with our lives,” Bucking Bobby said. “You impinged the character of Barton Stevenson, who happens to be a personal friend, although, his past behavior could easily lead other rogue billionaires to believe that they, too, can commit egregious acts and have them conveniently disposed of by a crack security team. Unfortunately, these fine gentlemen had no part in those sordid operations and are the kind of men who would never allow such an injustice to occur in the first place. Of course, part of your problem is that you treat your security personnel like shit, so they have no pride in their work, as evidenced by their sterling work in Galveston,” I said. “Christ, this is unbearable,” Hatteberg practically screamed. “What, I find this establishment rather pleasant,” I replied. “I was referring to this conversation.” “You find me unbearable?” “No, just this conversation.” “Are you going to make this right,” I asked the two men. “Yes, yes, I swear,” Van Lear said as he broke down. “I don’t want my name besmirched my two low-grade men,” I continued. “No, no, that’ll never happen,” Hatteberg assured me. “Very well, let’s enjoy breakfast,” I said. “Oh God, “Bucking Bobby wailed before laying his head on the table. The manager walked over to the table and asked if everything was okay. “He’s just dandy, Sir, I think he’s overcome with emotion from some wonderful news he got from Galveston,” I replied. “Oh, is their cause for celebration,” the manager asked. “Why I believe there is.” “Excellent, I’ll bring out some freshly baked pastries.” “Yeah, that’s mighty nice of you. Isn’t that nice, Bobby? What do you say, Miller, can you go for a pastry,” I asked the two dickheads who would have given anything to be elsewhere.

Cullen then joined us.

“Look who is here,” I told my old buddy. “What a pleasant surprise, I think you should get a picture with those two,” he suggested. “What a terrific idea.” “No, no,” Van Lear begged. “Yes, yes, now don’t give me any bullshit, Bobby.” I took a seat in between the two assholes and put my arms around their shoulders and told them to smile for the camera. Cullen took his sweet time and then snapped off a couple of shots. “These are priceless pics, Scragg.” “You want to sit between Bucking Bobby and Fast Miller,” I then asked the Sorcerer. “Sure.” “We gotta go,” Hatteberg cried out. “Sit down,” Cullen threatened in a muted voice that terrified the two men and startled the security team. The waitress came over and asked if Cullen was ordering and he told her the most expensive thing on the menu. Van Lear and Hatteberg had given up hope and looked like condemned men, which warmed my heart.

I then turned serious.

“It would have been easier, to tell the truth, but that isn’t who you guys are. Now, it’s all downhill. Oh well, the only difference between you and a common scumbag is money, and any schmuck can hit the lottery. I trust you’ll do the right thing concerning that young lady, but if you don’t, well, you know what happens.” “We’ve already sent the money,” Van Lear said between the tears. “Good, don’t you feel better?” Neither man answered, which told me everything I needed to know about them.

I then threw them out, and we enjoyed a hearty breakfast with terrific fellowship.

Published in: on February 27, 2017 at 5:08 am  Leave a Comment  
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Ribs and Insults 5023

Since Van Lear and Hatteberg were paying for the meal, we went all out and ordered ribs by the score and told the hotel staff to send them up to a private banquet room. The security team was still fuming over being used by the two billionaires, but I told them to forget about it. “It’ll eventually come back to haunt them, and if it’s any consolation, it’s your impeccable reputation and professionalism that drew them to you,” I said. “That’s no consolation, Scragg, they were looking for damage control for when this shit blew up,” Pierre scoffed. “Of course, but hey, at least they sought out the best.” “We’re not into damage control,” Jacque protested. “I don’t know, Charles and company conceal the fact that you’re a fucking Neanderthal pretty well,” Rory quipped. “You little punk, I’ll pound you silly!” “Isn’t that what cavemen do?” “Asshole!”

Jacque never learns.

We all noticed that Brodowski looked a little down, so Cullen asked him if he was okay. “I’m fine,” he replied. “You sure,” I asked. “Yeah, just the end of a pointless relationship,” the ex-Seal said. “Sorry to hear that.” “She took everything and is now in Vegas living it up, but that’s okay like I said it was pointless,” he continued, looking ready to fall apart. “Hang in there,” Kim said in a consoling voice. “You’ll be fine,” Jonah added.

Rory began to laugh.

“It was pointless because this chump had no point if you know what I mean,” the bassist said. “Rory,” my brother screamed. “Yep, this dumb Polock didn’t have the goods to keep his woman happy, so now she’s gone. Ain’t that just like a dumb Polock, but hey, he thinks it was real and had meaning. What a stupid fuck,” Rory continued. Brodowski looked at Rory dumbfounded. My brother wore an angry expression.

Marnell began to laugh.

“Oh shit, you should have seen your face,” he told Brodowski, who then shook his head. “Alright, I walked right into that,” he admitted. “You sure did, fuck nut,” Rory replied. The ex-Seal and high-fived the wicked bassist. “That’s was perfectly awful,” Kim said indignantly. “Scragg, slap your brother.” “Rory, that was cruel.” “Kim, shut the fuck up.” “I walked into it, Kim, it was my fault,” Brodowski said. “Why was it your fault.” “He told you why.” “Rory!” “He learned just like Charles is gonna learn when Lynette gives him the old heave-ho,” Rory then said.

You could see the Frenchman buckle.

Rory the rest of crew, minus Kim, laughed. Charles gave Rory and icy look before throwing up his hands. “Goddamnit,” he then sneered. “Look at Kim trying to be a sensitive guy. I bet Michelle wishes he would grow a pair and act like a man,” Rory continued without mercy. “Shut up, Rory!” “Shit, that’s all you’ve got?” “I’m not into juvenile pranks like this.” “Alright, got to your room and watch chick flicks you limp dick wanker.” “Go to hell!” “Oooh, that hurt.” “And you’re just immature!” “Will you stop,” I told my brother. “He’s hurtful, Scragg.” “Does anyone look hurt?” Kim looked around and saw everyone smirking at him. “Fine, this shit is insane,” he bellowed.

Rory then took a rib off Ray’s plate.

“Hey, I told you not to mess with my ribs,” the crazy bastard growled. “I don’t care what no illiterate Cajun bastard thinks, I’m eatin’ this rib and if you don’t like it, Ray, then you can go fuck yourself,” Rory replied. “Why you little fucker, I’m gonna fuck you up.” “Ya first gotta get the crawdads off your dick and the crabs outta your ass, which in your case will take at least twenty-four hours, so shut up and take it like a man,” the bassist replied. “I’m not illiterate, either.” “Yeah you are, you’re from Louisiana, aren’t ya?” “Why you no good piece of trash.”

Ray then grabbed the rib out of Rory’s hand and cleaned the bone in one bite.

“Scragg, this barbaric,” Kim said hysterically. The crew laughed as my brother looked about in horror. “I feel like I’m in a horror show!” The crew laughed as Kim hung his head in despair.

He’ll learn.

Published in: on February 26, 2017 at 10:39 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Wisdom And The Lack Thereof 5022

I got up in the late morning and walked to the courtyard. Cullen joined me a few minutes later and took a seat next to me. “You still pissed off,” he asked. “Yes, I’m tired of getting embroiled in billionaires schemes.” “You call Anton?” “Yes.” “He’s the man who can find shit out.” “Cullen, this shit is outrageous. I realize the rich are different, hell, we’re rich now, but shit, we don’t act that way. Of course, there were no silver spoons in our childhood.” “We’re also not your average band, Scragg.” “Other people knew what those assholes did and did nothing because they had money. Fuck, I guess we’re corrupt, too.” “No, not like that. I mean Blake did some shitty things, but ultimately she performed a public service.” “Cullen.” The Sorcerer laughed and said that he was merely trying to cheer me up. “You’re an asshole,” I replied.

Cullen then asked me why Barton wasn’t on tour with us.

“I have my suspicions, but I’m trying to stay out of people’s business,” he added. “No you’re not, you know why.” “I do?” “Yes.” “You want to hear what I think?” “Go ahead, Cullen.” “Chase is no CEO, and neither are Barton’s daughters. The poor fucker hates the prospect of having to do that shit again because he’s getting up in years, but doesn’t like the idea of turning it over to someone outside the family. Chase only cares about tech shit, which is the future, but he doesn’t understand money.” “You got the idea.” “What should he do?” “Turn it over to the most honest man I know.” “Who’s that,” Cullen asked. “Kilburn.” “Are you serious?” “Yes, Jerry understands all that shit and has the streetfighter mentality you need to survive in that world.” “Have you run that by him?” “Yes.” “What did he say?” “He wants me involved.” “Smart man.” “Yeah.” “Scragg, you handle all of our money, so why not his?” “Because that’s too much money, and besides, Kilburn and I do that.” “True, you two make a good team.” “How can you guys be such assholes with money?” “It’s easier to let you do it.” “You guys need to learn how to handle your own money.” “Daisy is getting better with it.” “But you still suck.” “And?” “Dickhead?” “Why do we pretend not to know something when we do,” Cullen then asked. “So we don’t upset those around us,” I replied. “Do we not trust them?” “What the fuck?” “Seriously, this is how things get fucked up,” Cullen said. “”You’re right, it is how things go awry and how little lies turn into one gigantic mess, but at the time it seems like the proper thing to do.” “Isn’t it you who always says that the truth is always the best way to go?” “I don’t need this shit today.” “If not today, Scragg, when?” “You no good bastard.” Cullen laughed and then suggested we get something to eat.


Published in: on February 26, 2017 at 11:03 am  Leave a Comment  
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An Utter Lack Of Shame 5021

The scene at AT & T Stadium was surreal as we took the stage. There’s something about one hundred and five thousand people packed in a stadium that is just unreal. I’m certainly not complaining because the reception we got was incredible and it provided us with the adrenaline to cut loose and put on an unforgettable show.

Feeling emboldened by the positive reviews of the soundtrack for “Holy Sinner, ” I asked the crowd if they wanted to hear some of the album. A thunderous cheer came roaring back at me, and we proceeded to go wild. Cullen temporarily put down his guitar and picked up a harmonica, which he played with amazing skill. I could hear the crowd gasp when he blew into the harp, and they got to see another musical facet of the Sorcerer.

The there was Ray.

A prodigious guitar talent, the crazy bastard immediately picked up on the music and played it like he wrote the songs. His interplay with Kim was astounding, and it allowed me to get down and dirty on the slide. I expanded Enrico’s role, and he sang his heart on a couple of the songs, showing his formidable vocal chops. Rory, Jonah, and Beck were their stellar selves as always.

We played the whole album, and the stadium shook.

The show provided non-stop thrills for us and apparently did the same for the fans who made their presence heard all night. We gave it our all, and the crowd went home happy, which is always the goal. The stadium security team looked relieved as we headed to the showers. “You okay,” I asked one of them. “Good Lord, that was insane. The crowd behaved, but it was loud in here, and they kept it up all night long,” he replied. “Yeah, wasn’t it great,” I said. The officer laughed and patted me on the back. “You’re a nut, Scragg.” “Thanks for the terrific job you guys did, it is appreciated,” I then told him. “It’s our job, Scragg, and we know you care,” he replied.

After showering up, we headed to the airport, and after our stuff was loaded onto the jet, we took off to San Antonio. Robert Van Lear sat next to me and Miller Hatteberg, another billionaire land baron who has a stake in the oil business, took the seat across from mine. They said they had business in San Antonio and will are delighted that can fly us there. “It was a great show, and it made me feel like a kid again,” Van Lear said. “Good, we did our job,” I replied. “I wish there were more festive times in this country,” the oilman then said. “That’s going to take more than wishing,” I replied. “I know, and I realize that something has to be done to bridge this divisiveness that is tearing us apart.” “We need to lower the volume and take a step back,” I said. “That’s it,” Van Lear asked. “It’s a start.” “It’s not that simple.” “I didn’t say it was simple, in fact, it’s hard as hell to listen and not get riled up at things you don’t want to hear; however, if you want to curb some of this discourse, then people are going to have to shut the fuck up and take a breather from all the fussing,” I said. The two billionaires gave me a stunned look. “Oh yeah, I got your attention when I used profanity,” I said with a smile.

I didn’t want to talk about the political and social divide in the country after a kickass show, but that was my fate for getting a free flight to San Antonio. I decided to ask them point blank what this was really all about and they both gave me the same dazed expression. “You guys aren’t frightened, you’re trying to make shit disappear like it never happened. Marty, can you come here please,” I asked my manager. “What do you need, Scragg,” he asked. “Type in Miller Hatteberg and see what comes up besides land and oil,” I said. Marty did, and within seconds we discovered that the billionaire is active in auto racing, both in NASCAR and Formula One. “Shit, and look here, he’s all over the place, and now he can’t be. “Now, look up Robert Van Lear.” “I’m into the rodeo, and we’re trying to assemble a new security team so we can get our lives back,” Bucking Bobby screamed. “No, this has nothing to do with fright, it’s about covering up a crime,” I replied.

Van Lear and Hatteberg wanted to jump out of the plane.

“Oh God, I’m sorry,” Hatteberg pleaded. “Yeah, here’s what happened, last May, you, Van Lear and a couple of other billionaires went down to Galveston for some fun in the sun. Unfortunately, things got out of hand and your security details imbibed and enjoyed the services of prostitutes, which a couple were infected with a nasty strain of syphilis. That’s bad, but then, a couple of your goons assaulted a young girl named Lisa Aguiar, who doesn’t remember much because of the trauma. This charade is over, but you guys are going to pay,” I said.

Hatteberg threw up.

“Oh God, what do want,” Van Lear pleaded. “Nothing, Lisa Aguiar was a med student and will be again because you’re going to pay for it, plus, you’re going to set her family up for life. Christ, I need to scrub down after taking this fucking flight.” “How did you find out,” Van Lear asked. “Shut the fuck up,” I screamed. The billionaire recoiled in his chair and began to sob.

We landed in San Antonio, got our stuff, and then checked into the hotel. I told Brodowski and Marnell that if they took that job that they were dickheads and would have their balls chopped off. They assured me they would do no such thing. The rest of the security team looked at me in disbelief and then asked if there was anything I wanted them to do. “You’re good,” I replied. “We feel like idiots,” Charles said. “Don’t, you were following orders.” “No, this is fucked up.” “You’re right, but we straightened it out.” “How did you know?” “Something told me it was fucked up. They were going to try and buy you guys. Barton had no idea, but he’s gotta stop associating with shit like this. Those other rich pricks at that meeting were also played like chumps. These two fucks are something else, but we’ll make sure they pay, even though it’ll never be enough.”

I then went to bed.

Published in: on February 26, 2017 at 8:58 am  Comments (2)  
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Valley Of Darkness 5020

I called Blake in the morning, and she said that she saw footage of Ray and me in the restaurant jamming away. “It looks like you guys were having a good time,” she added. “Yeah, he’s a wild man, but he can sure play,” I replied. “The movie opened up to huge numbers, Elmer, and I mean big,” Blake then said. “Are you serious?” “Yes, very big.” “How big?” “Over eighty million dollars.” “Goodness gracious,” I replied. “Yeah, it’s a hit.” “Wow.” “Paige, Caroline, and Robin went to see it last night.” “Oh, I thank them for their loyalty.” “They added a couple of scenes they didn’t see,” Blake then said. “Oh.” “Which one?” “The one with the two men who were contemplating robbing you at the motel.” “Oh, Christ, Blake.” “I know, Elmer, and they were visibly upset.” “Why did they do that.” “Seth thought it added something to the film.” “Damn.” “It does, Elmer.” “What?” “It does, I saw the movie in the afternoon, and it makes your character more menacing.” “How did the audiences like the film?” “They were shocked, but they seemed to like it. Paige accused me of having a hand in the movie.” “You did.” “A little bit.” “Blake, you transformed Crawford Calhoun from a bumpkin to a psychopathic manipulator.” “Oh, so you’re blaming me, too.” “Yes, you made him terrifying.” “You played him.” “Blake!” My wife laughed at me and said that I need to lighten up. “I think you’ll like the film.” “I’m delighted that it’s a hit, but I could do without hysterical daughters.” “They’ll get over it,” my wife replied in an icy tone.

Oh shit.

I told Cullen and Rory about the added scene, and they both laughed. “Damn, you were a complete animal in that movie,” Rory said. “You put it in overdrive,” Cullen added. “Yeah, my daughters were upset, and Paige suspects Blake had a bigger role in the movie than she let on.” “She did, Scragg isn’t that common knowledge,” the Sorcerer replied. “I didn’t think so.” “Blake isn’t going to let you do a movie without her first going over the script.” “That’s not true.”

My two band mates began to laugh.

“Now that’s funny,” Cullen declared. “What?” “Blake calls the shots when it comes to movies, Scragg and she carefully screens every script, so don’t give us this bullshit that she doesn’t.” “Well, she looks them over.” “No, she rewrites them to make your character better.” “I think that’s pushing it.” “Scragg, we know what goes on,” Rory said. “How does she do that so quickly,” I asked. “You don’t fuck with Blake, just remember that Scragg,” Cullen said with a grin. “What are saying.” “You’re dealing with a diabolical mind.” “Yeah, Scragg, Blake could come up with a lot of ways to eliminate your ass and make it look like natural causes,” Rory added with a cackle.

My baby has an active imagination that sometimes veers into the darkness when it comes to her scripts–shit, most of the time she stars into the abyss and tells us exactly what she sees–and produces work of stunning quality and originality. She’s a genius when it comes to writing dialog.

And it comes naturally to her like a stroll through the valley of darkness.


Published in: on February 25, 2017 at 7:58 am  Leave a Comment  
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Crazy Ray Crashes Dallas 5019

After an awkward supper with the billionaires at an overpriced restaurant, the only saving grace was that the movie was completely sold out, which meant the night ended early to everyone’s relief. Back at the hotel, I retired to my suite and took a seat in a recliner. Rory did manage to purchase a copy of the soundtrack of the film, and he put it in. The rest of the crew filed in, and we listened to the CD that sounded great and was romping and stomping good time from start to finish. “Holy shit, this soundtrack is gonna be a hit,” Rory declared. “I don’t know about that, but I love the way it sounds,” I replied. “Damn, Scragg, this thing smokes,” Cullen remarked. “I had a lot of fun making it. Joey and his band helped me out some, so did Paige, Farley, and Dave,” I said. “It does kick serious ass,” Jonah added. “Five fucking stars from just about every music publication,” Rory screamed. “Yeah, this album is killer,” he wailed. Jonah and Enrico pulled out their phones and pulled up the reviews and showed them to me. “I believe you,” I said.

The security team then got summoned to the front desk.

“What’s that about,” Kim asked. “Who knows, probably something with those billionaires,” I replied. “Man, that was a fucked up meal,” Rory said. “It sure was, but at least it didn’t last that long,” Cullen remarked. We all laughed at some of the bullshit we heard.

The phone in the suite rang.

“Scragg, could you please come down here,” Renaud asked. “Is there a problem?” “Well, kinda, but not really.” “What the fuck.” “You’ll see when you get here.” I clicked off and told the band that something was up at the front desk. They all went with me, and we headed down.

We arrived at the front desk, and Charles pointed toward the restaurant. I walked to the entrance, and the hostess guided us to the back. I could hear the unmistakable sounds of slide guitar played by a master. I looked at the stage area and laughed.

It was Ray Musser jamming away with the house pianist.

“This was supposed to be a mellow night, but it’s turned into a rowdy rocking ruckus,” the young lady said. “How does it sound,” I asked her. “Terrific.” Ray saw me and smiled. The crazy bastard stopped playing and told me that he flew in this evening. “Did you get up with Clayton,” I asked. “Yes, and he got me the ticket.” I looked at Marty, who told me he wasn’t notified. “Of course not, but what the hell,” I said.

The patrons in the restaurant then gave me a cheer.

“Thank you, I’m just here to retrieve our problem child,” I told them. “Play something, Scragg,” someone hollered. “No, no, just here to check out the commotion.” Ray walked over and put his guitar in my hand. “Ray!” The crazy bastard then walked to the corner and got out another Airline Town and Country guitar and plugged it in. “Come on, Scragg,” Ray said as he let out a wicked slide run. “Ray,” I snarled in frustration.

I then shrugged and joined the Crazy Ray on “Mumbo Gumbo”

The pianist, Benny, smiled and jumped into the action and the crowd got worked up. It wasn’t long before the high-class joint was transformed into a rowdy concert hall and the helpless manager looked on in disbelief as his affluent customers were throwing down like old pros.

It wasn’ the way I had planned to spend the evening, but I also didn’t count on Ray coming to Dallas and raising hell. We shut down the restaurant with Ray and I wailing away while Enrico sang his heart out. When the night was over, the manager looked at us and then downed a beer in record time.

It looks like Ray id going to be a handful.

Published in: on February 25, 2017 at 4:50 am  Leave a Comment  
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A Night Out With Skittish Billionaires 5018

We flew into Dallas and got put up in a five-star hotel where we slept until eleven. After showering up and getting dressed. We met the billionaire businessmen led by Robert Van Lear, the CEO of Van Lear Energy, a vast conglomerate that is into everything petroleum. A sharp dressed man in his late sixties with an athletic build and silver hair that makes him look like that classic billionaire, Van Lear’s piercing eyes and winning smile convey confidence almost to the point of arrogance. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Scragg Man, Barton has told me a lot about you and is impressed with you intellect as well as your prodigious musical talents,” he said. “The pleasure is all mine, Sir.” “As you know, these are divisive times, which can be scary for people like me. I hear you have some of the finest people looking out for you,” Van Lear then said. “We have a fine security team,” I replied. “We’ve had a couple of incidents over the past year that has yet to be resolved, so I thought we could talk with your team and see what they do.” “Sure,” I called Charles over and told him to answer Mr. Van Lear’s questions. Van Lear led Charles and the other billionaires into a meeting room. Jacque stayed behind, and we went to find something to eat.

We got a sandwich at the snack bar and watched the water fountain. I asked Jacque what had the other billionaires looking so spooked. “It’s like their life had flashed before their eyes,” I added. The Frenchman laughed and said that several of them have gotten constant death threats and some have experienced close calls. “I heard Van Lear say that he had some incidents and he’s not alone. Most of those guys are oilmen, and there’s a lot of people who see them as the enemy. Barton had a hand in setting this up because he’s also been under a lot of threats. They have a private army guarding those guys in New York,” Charles replied. “You know what’s going on,” I asked. “With Barton?” “Yes.” “The only thing I know is that they’re doing some reorganization.” “That’s all you know?” “Yes, Sir.” “When does Scragg get to play piano,” Rory asked. Jacque and I chuckled. “What’s so funny,” Rory asked. “That ain’t happening, this is all about security,” I replied. “What?” “About six months ago, a bomb was delivered to Van Lear’s house. Two months ago, someone took a shot at his car. Last week, he started getting death threats via computer, which they’re still trying to trace. The same has happened to some of those other guys in that room. They want to keep it quiet, so they don’t give these lunatics publicity, but it’s to the point where something needs to change in their security protocol. Sorry for the cloak and dagger shit, but it wasn’t my call. This is crazy shit, and unfortunately, we’re mixed up with a billionaire who travels with us and is high-profile, hence, all this security,” I clarified. “Christ, does any other band go through this,” Rory asked. “Probably not, but that makes us unique.” “Okay, so it’s fucked up as usual?” “Right.”

Three hours later, Pierre walked out of the room looking frazzled. I asked the Frenchman how the meeting went and he shook his head. “They’re a bunch of rattled billionaires who want assurances that nothing bad will ever happen to them, which isn’t possible. A lot of them have been on lockdown for awhile and want to live again, so we told them that they’re going to have to change their habits and upgrade their security. Brodowski and Marnell both got jobs, but not until after the tour. Thank God,  that’s over,” he said before stretching his neck. “Did you guys get offers,” I asked. “Yes.” “Why didn’t you take them?” “Because I don’t want to be around those guys,” Pierre replied.

Charles and the rest of the security team walked out fo the room look as ragged at Pierre, and all of them wanted something to drink. I laughed and told them I was going to my suite. “You want to have dinner with Van Lear and company,” Charles asked. “Who’s buying?” “They are?” “Sure.” “Then we’ll catch a movie,” Rory added.

A night out with skittish billionaires–yeah, that’s fucked up.

Published in: on February 24, 2017 at 11:15 pm  Leave a Comment  
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A Jamming Revival In Houston 5017

The band and I hit the stage in full-throttle as we opened the show with songs from the soundtrack from “Holy Sinner” that the guys learned and mastered this afternoon. The foundation of the music is basic, which made it easy for them to learn their part. The slide and harmonica parts that I play are a tad tricky, but since I wrote and know them by heart, it wasn’t a problem for me. I told the band to feel the music and cut loose, and they followed my lead. The crowd stomped their feet and raised the roof as we turned the stadium into a jamming revival. With tunes like “The Devil’s Sermon” “Backwoods Salvation” Blind Testimony” “Gonna Tell Jesus” “Muddy Water” and “No Salvation Without Sin” it was easy to let the spirit move you around. I was so stoked that I decided to the entire album that kept the crowd wired and full of energy.

Yeah, this is what I’m talking about.

The show was another wild one that sent the crowd home happy. The stadium security team gave me a look of relief as we exited the stage. “They behaved and never gave us any trouble, but damn, they were loud, Scragg,” one of the officers said. “Yeah, they were great,” I replied. He laughed and patted me on the back. “Only you,” he declared. My brother gave me a stunned look and asked what happened onstage. “One helluva show,” I replied. “Is it going to be like this from here on out?” “I sure hope so.” “Shit, we’re just getting warmed up. This is what it’s all about,” Rory added. “Fuck yeah,” Jonah hollered. “Oh great, now you’ve got him talking trash,” Kim groaned. “Scragg, do something with him,” Rory said. “Don’t worry, Kim will fall into line.” “Does he need his prostate milked or something?” “Rory!” “Just asking.” “That was like revival without the boring sermon,” Beck remarked. “Yeah, if church were like that more people would go,” I replied. “Fucking right, dump the preacher and let the choir take over,” Rory chimed in. “Let’s go see “Holy Sinner” tomorrow,” Enrico said. “We have to see what are benefactors want to do,” I replied. “They want to see the movie,” Rory grumbled. “We can’t force them,” Kim said. “No, but we can convince them and we will.” “Maybe they won’t find that film appropriate,” my brother continued. “Kim, you need to shut the fuck up before I lose it.” “You’re such a vulgar asshole, Rory!” “Right, now shut the fuck up and let the spirit of this night move you.” “Yeah, I’m gonna tell Jesus that the Devil’s tempting me, I’m gonna tell Jesus that the Devil’s tempting me. Jesus is gonna give me the strength to be free, so I can tell the Devil to let me be,” Enrico belted out. “That’s right, Jesus also knows that Kim is an annoying prick, so he’s going to pacify me with a blonde-haired pretty boy with six-pack abs, a tight little ass, and nice stiff dick,” Rory said. “You’re so disgusting and sacrilegious,” my brother bellowed. The crew laughed as we headed to the showers.

What a night in Houston.

Published in: on February 24, 2017 at 5:30 am  Leave a Comment  
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Insults For Lunch 5016

We all slept in late and didn’t get up and about until almost dinner time. The crew assembled in the hallway, and we decided that subs would suffice. Marty said that there’s a sub joint down the street that delivers and we went with that. We placed our orders and then called the hotel to inquire about the use of a small meeting room, which they told us was available to simply walk into and lock the door.

A half-hour later, we were chomping on subs and relaxing in the meeting room. Rory said that “Holy Sinner” comes out tomorrow and the reviews are killer. “Scragg Man gives a terrifying performance as a psychopathic charlatan.” “A daring move by a man whose past sometimes collides with art.”  “A chilling look into the mind of a soulless manipulator.”  “It sounds like the critics like the film, Scragg, which I know isn’t a big deal to you, but maybe it’ll help make it a bigger hit,” Rory said. “I hope so.” “Say, let’s do a few songs off the soundtrack,” he then suggested. “Yeah, that’s a good idea,” Beck added. “Okay, I’m game.” “Cool, get the music and we’ll work on them after lunch,” Rory replied. “Look here, Rocket said the soundtrack to “Holy Sinner” is a musical tour de force and says it’s not to be missed,” Jonah said. “That’s what the fuck I’m talking about,” Rory hollered. “Say, we need a copy of that,” he then said. “We’ll get one Friday,” I said. “Why didn’t Marty bring one?” “Because I didn’t think about it,” my manager snapped. “Dickhead?” “Fuck you.” “You wish. Scragg, you need to fire that cocksucker.” “Up yours, Rory!” “Like I said, you wish, asshole.” “You don’t have to be so vulgar,” Jonah hollered at Rory, which made his day. “Why you little faggot, I ought to beat you silly.” “And stop calling me that!” “I’ll call you what I want.” “Asshole!” “Please.” “Words can hurt, Rory,” my brother felt compelled to say. Rory gave him a quizzical look.

The table then erupted in laughter.

“Oh shit, are you sure this wet noodle is your brother,” the bassist asked me. “Oh, so telling you that hurtful words hurt makes me a wet noodle,” Kim said, making his plight worse. “Christ, Scragg, slap him.” What?” “Shut up, Kim,” I told my brother. “Fine, hurl insults,” Kim said in a huff. “Good, we will.” “But they can go too far,” Kim added. “Jesus H. Christ, Kim’s the only person, joins a rock band and becomes less cool,” Rory said. “Shut up!” “That’s all you got?” “I don’t feel the need to hurl insults.” “Because you’re a limp dick wanker.” “Shut up, Rory!” “Wow, you sound like Jonah.” “Great, insults for lunch,” my brother said, which caused more laughter. “Didn’t you play in a band for twenty years,” Rory asked him. “Yes, but we didn’t act like this.” “Oh, is that why you never made millions?” More howls ensued, and Kim threw up his hands. “I guess, we should have behaved like unruly teenagers, and we would have undoubtedly become millionaires.” “Yeah, you probably would have, but instead, you acted like gentlemen and look what happened,” Rory replied.

Kim shook his head while we laughed at him.

Published in: on February 23, 2017 at 9:19 am  Leave a Comment  
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The Billionaire’s Club 5015

I opened the show at NRG Stadium with “Texas Skies” a song about the state’s massive size and diversity. Using the Eastwood resonator to create the soundscapes, I found myself already cutting loose and ready to throw caution out the window. When I finished the tune, it was time to get a tad wild.

The rest of the show was full-throttle, and the crowd loved it. I let the band offer up suggestions, and they did so with gusto. It also showed me that they were ready for anything and that I could turn them loose. We walked off the stage tired, but still buzzing from adrenaline. The crowd exited the stadium in a giddy mood, and they burned up social media praising our performance.

And we do this again tomorrow night.

Back at the hotel, the gathered in the courtyard after a hearty meal. Jonah and Enrico were still wired from the show and being able to call some of the shots. I told Rory that it didn’t take them that long for them to catch on. “They know the deal and what’s at stake,” he replied. “And tomorrow we’ll mix it up again,” I said.

Rory the grinned.

“You like all this flying to each gig,” he asked me. “Yeah, it gets us there quicker, and it beats the road,” I replied. “I hear we’re getting a private flight to Houston,” Rory then said. “That’s correct.” “And we’ll be entertaining oilmen and other billionaires.” “That’s also correct.” “Why are we doing that?” “Because it’s a free flight, which appealed to Clayton, and it’s a chance to make contacts.” “What do we do?” “Use your celebrity to enthrall those billionaires.” “Isn’t that tacky?” “Who cares, I’m playing classical piano for those who appreciate it while Cullen will be dazzling them with his guitar artistry. The security team is holding a seminar about personal safety. The rest of you will be assigned something,” I replied. Rory and shook his head. “Only we do shit like this,” he remarked. “Yep.” “Is anyone we know going to be there?” “Who knows?” “Damn, Scragg, how do you entertain billionaires?” “Use your imagination.” “You’re working an angle, Scragg.” “No, just making contacts.” “For what?” “The future.” “Why do I get the feeling that one day I’ll be seeing your mug on the cover of Forbes magazine telling everyone how to make their first billion,” Rory cracked. “Look, play along with the game and listen to what those people have to say.” “Yeah, maybe one day I’ll join the billionaire’s club,” Rory said in jest. “Maybe. “Please,” the bassist then scoffed.

Rory’s already wealthy, but since he has no real responsibility, the idea of being uber-rich seems pointless to him. As long as he has a place to live, food, a cool bike, and money to buy basses, Rory is happy as can be, which is great. I, on the other hand, have plenty of responsibility and can’t just live anywhere, so I’m always looking for new opportunities. I wish my life could be simple again, but it ain’t happening, so why not try and join the billionaire’s club.

Okay, it’s probably a stretch, but a man can dream.


Published in: on February 23, 2017 at 4:17 am  Leave a Comment  
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